Calming anxious Bichon Frise in a multi-pet home

Separation anxiety is one of the most distressing things to deal with — for the dog living through it and for you watching it happen. The good news is that products can genuinely make a real difference, but they work best when paired with some behavioural work alongside. To point you toward the right thing, I'd love to know: how bad is it for your Bichon — mild whining, destructive behaviour, or full panic? How long has it been going on, and what have you already tried?

That's a really important constraint and you're right to flag it. Before I suggest anything, can I ask a couple of things? Does the anxiety kick in the moment you start preparing to leave — getting your keys, putting shoes on — or only after you've actually gone? And is she crated, free-roaming, or do the other pets stay with her when you're out?

That pre-departure anxiety is really telling — her nervous system is already in overdrive before you've even opened the front door, which is common in Bichons. The fact that the Labrador is present but she's still struggling rules out pure loneliness and points toward genuine anxiety that needs its own targeted support. Here's my recommendation: the Adaptil Go Calming Collar for Dogs. It's a collar that releases a synthetic version of the pheromone a mother dog produces to reassure puppies — it works exclusively through dog-specific receptors, so your Labrador won't be negatively affected and your cat won't register it at all. It's worn directly by your Bichon, so the effect is localised to her. It lasts around four weeks continuously, and it works cumulatively — most owners notice a meaningful difference by week two. It won't sedate her; it takes the edge off the underlying anxiety so she can actually respond to any behavioural work you're doing alongside it. Given that she's reacting to pre-leaving cues, I'd also gently suggest starting a departure-desensitisation routine — picking up your keys and sitting back down, for instance — while she's wearing the collar. The product alone won't fix the door-frame chewing, but it genuinely helps create the calm headspace where progress becomes possible.

A few practical things worth knowing: fit it snugly — you should be able to slide two fingers underneath, but no looser than that, otherwise the pheromone release against the skin isn't consistent. Put it on a couple of days before you need it to start working if you can, so there's already some background level built up. Give it the full four weeks before you judge it; the first week can sometimes look like nothing's changed. Replace it monthly. And keep it dry where possible — it still works if she gets wet, but frequent soaking can shorten the collar's effective life. One more thing: the collar addresses the anxiety, but the chewing is a learned coping behaviour that will need direct work to unlearn even once she's calmer — so if you haven't already, it's worth looking into a qualified behaviourist or a structured online separation anxiety protocol like the one from Malena DeMartini.

That's exactly the right combination. The collar gives her nervous system a calmer baseline; the behavioural work teaches her that being alone is genuinely safe. Between the two, five-year-old Bichons respond really well — they're bright dogs and once the anxiety dial is turned down a notch, they tend to make good progress. Good luck with her.